Sorry, my love...

"But, you have to understand, I can't just be some object. You can't just assume that something as simple as a hug will make me feel ok... and then you just walk away? no... no!
Just understand I'm human, and humans like to not be treated like some personal coathanger. I just don't get it. Honestly. God! "

... So, what do you think? I'm joining this afterschool drama team. We just randomly improvise and someone takes one that they really liked and we act it, having someone take notes on what we basically say with our lines (since this IS an improv). Then, we just keep it in a folder for classes and stuff. I think That was one of the ones we did. It's pretty cool.
Someone was really mad at their BF because he never talks to her outside of school anymore and just walked into her class around 6th hour and asked her to hide "something" since his teacher wouldn't let him take it into class. So she was pissed at him...
And she was still steamed when she went to this theater extra. The funny thing is, I had to take over her part when we re-read it. So, I had some frustration in store, because something similar to that happened to me.
YC comes into Orchestra (even though he's in Band). He comes up to me and says, "hey, my teacher won't let me take my coat into class. Can you hold onto it until the end of school? I'll come by to pick it up. Thanks." *hug*, "bye". Runs away...
I'm just sitting there with this huge ass coat in my arms now, and i'm just wondering how this all happened... and i'm kinda annoyed. So, after Class, I decide to wear it and hope to leave school with it still on. He comes too soon though, and takes it away from me, saying, "wow, no offence but you're a midgit!"
That kind of got at me. But, then he gives me a hug, trying to make me feel better, and then just leaves. So, that frustration of feeling really cheap and somewhat like i've just been treated like an object kind of got me through the whole "act mad at your BF" theater improv.
It's funny how something so ill humored as feeling cheap really got me through the day. ha!
Except for that, i'm pretty tired, bored, and scared...
I've been scared lately. I know why, too. But, there's nothing I can do about it. I face this every day... and I try to stay farther away from the problem, but it seems to follow me in the hallways at school, in class, etc. And I don't like it. Not one bit. I just want this to leave me alone!
leave me alone! *screams at someone next to her* LEAVE ME ALONE! ...
I don't want to be scared. Not again. I was scared a while back and it's still here. Wind, carry me away from here, into the Mountains, where the Yellow Sun meets the Blue of the sky, where Willy is no where to be seen...
nvm then, since someone never cares to read this.
XP